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Love matters

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There have been so many songs written about love, usually of the romantic kind of love and sometimes those songs are quite sad as the person has lost their love. 

However, romantic love is one of the many ways we can express this amazing emotion. Yes, love can lift us up and also sadly, when it's lost can pull us down and yes, love is what can lift us back up again!

However, love isn't finite, we have an infinite capacity to love, and it doesn't need to be of the romantic love for another, or even the love of a parent or a grandparent, it can be the love for friends, family, including pets, community, a cause bigger than ourselves.

When we are young and dependent on others our focus of experiencing love can be very much about US! I need fed, winded, nappy changed, attention! We are pretty oblivious of the needs of others; we are only babies.

As we grow, we become aware of other people in our lives who matter to us and what they mean to us and how we want them to be happy and to be okay.

As we grow further, we become aware of our external environment, our community, our world, and it begins to matter to us that there is fairness, that there is equality, tolerance, kindness, and consideration for the natural world.

Love sometimes starts from a place of what is in it for me but evolves to a place of what is in it for all of us, into perhaps what can I give just for the love of giving to make a difference? 

Sometimes giving with no obvious return, in fact not seeking a return, sharing the love because it makes us feel good, being kind to others and the world. This does not mean giving at the expense of our own wellbeing, this piece on boundaries may be of interest www.cope-scotland.org/index.php/latest-blog/establish-boundaries-not-barricades

As there is a difference between freely choosing to put our energy into a cause bigger than ourselves, and feeling forced into actions we would not choose, or made to feel guilty for something which is not our responsibility, this piece may be of interest www.cope-scotland.org/index.php/latest-blog/learning-not-to-beat-yourself-up-with-guilt-1Love should not be forced, it's about what you decide to love, not what others decide for you. If you find you have a love that is damaging your wellbeing, perhaps speak to someone as you matter.

It's also important to note, not we only love one thing, we can love our partner, family, friends and a cause, as shared already, love is one resource we have a healthy supply of!

To love others, we must first learn to love ourselves, this wee piece may be of interest www.cope-scotland.org/index.php/latest-blog/feeling-good-being-me.

Sometimes things happen to us where we find it hard to love ourselves or others, this wee piece and the tips do not replace professional advice, sometimes we do need counselling to work through our experiences. 

Speak to your GP or other health care provider or check out the 'whit's happening' info mag on the site for services where self-management alone is not enough.

In a time of restrictions due to COVID-19, there is one thing which only we ourselves put a restriction on, our capacity to love, love for ourselves, each other and the planet is a resource we have an infinite supply of if we just tap into it. The tips and postcard which follow may offer some ideas if you want to bring more love into your life.

"The more you are motivated by Love, the more Fearless & Freer your action will be."

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